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  • Broward-Palm Beach New Times

    The Lost Season

    Here's how you become one of those people who screams at his kid's coach.

    By Bob Norman

  • Houston Press

    Deadly Evidence

    First, Houston's DNA lab became a laughingstock. Then its controversial director was murdered.

    By Randall Patterson

What Cats Think

By Michael Leaverton

Published on July 12, 2008 at 4:21am

When Jaws came out, shark researchers got all shouty, claiming that Steven Spielberg misrepresented the evilness of great whites. The same did not happen among alligator researchers after Alligator came out, because alligators are fucking assholes. So are piranhas — Piranha 2: The Spawning was practically a public service announcement. (It was also James Cameron’s first film, long before he got Leo to terrorize rich people on a boat). And Phase IV arrived unscathed, since even scientists are on board with the idea of killer ants.

All of these classics, however, go meek before the ultimate animal-exploitation flick, 1977's Day of the Animals, in which a panoply of God’s creatures mull it over and decide to kill every human around, and in the process a shirtless Leslie Nielsen fights a 12-foot grizzly bear. These five films make up the bill for Midnites for Maniacs' "Animals Attacking Humans," but arrive early — first blood is drawn well before sundown.
Sat., July 19, 3 p.m., 2008



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