"24 hours. 350 miles. His girlfriend's kids. What could possibly go wrong?" Here's the short answer: a flaccid screenplay, bratty kids stripped of depth and personality, a single joke replayed in every scene, unearned attempts at sentiment, and a bizarrely whitened backdrop, presumably designed to broaden the film's appeal. The premise, on which every joke in the film relies, goes as follows: Nick Persons (Ice Cube) is a bachelor living the high life in Portland, Oregon. When he falls for a sexy single momma (Nia Long), he's forced to pander to her obnoxious kids in order to win her heart. In fact, he has to get them from Portland to Vancouver in time for New Year's. Are We There Yet? is a big, boring failure of slapstick and degradation, in which we witness the taking-down not merely of Ice Cube but of Satchel Paige and the environment. Of course, that's not to say your kids won't like it. — Melissa Levine